Have you ever felt ‘stuck’ in life?
I mean totally ‘stuck’–immobilized,
paralyzed or unable to make the right decision?
Several years ago, I felt totally stuck. I was considering a business opportunity that seemed like an ideal situation for me and promised to be very lucrative as well. However, I had hit burnout several times during the course of my association with this business and I had to admit that something did not feel right about the whole thing. I took two weeks off from communicating with the parties involved, believing that if I had some space I would find the answer that I needed, in order to know how to proceed. But at the end of the two weeks, I felt just as confused as I had been earlier, and did not know whether to proceed with a partnership or pull out partially or pull out entirely.
I went away to a nearby resort to try to clear my head and find the answer. After two days and nights I still was had no clear idea of what to do. I was trying so hard to figure everything out with my mind and my rational mind was not helping at all. Finally, in desperation, in the middle of the night I wrote:
“I need a new framework; a completely new way of looking at my life and making decisions.”
The next morning, I plugged in on youtube… a newfound video I came across while watching my favorite daily youtube channels. Though the video was of poor quality, I heard something that has become my new framework:
You have within you a god-given vibrational meter that tells you what is good for you and what is not good for you. That vibrational meter is your emotions. If something feels good, then it is good for you. If something does not feel good, then it isn’t.
I knew immediately that this business proposal was NOT good for me, because I did not feel entirely good about it. In fact, I was making myself sick trying to make it feel right when it was not.
What a relief it was to have this new framework from which to make decisions.
I had clarity and peace about not preceding with this business partnership AND I immediately wrote out a list of characteristics that I WANTED in a business partnership. Within a few days, I met my current business partner who is an absolute perfect match to that want list.
With the realization of this vibrational meter, you never need to make decisions with your mind. You never need to rationalize or justify your decisions. You simply need to recognize that “that doesn’t feel good” and “that feels good” and “that feels great!” to know what is right for you.
How to Write Goals
Once you have your strategy in place and you’re committed to following it through, you’ll then find that the next step is to break what you have planned down into steps that can then become goals.
So your intention is to become that rock star taking our YouTube route? Great. You now have a series of steps:
• Get a guitar
• Create a home studio
• Start a band
• Upload videos
The next step is actually sticking to this strategy and executing on your goals.
And this is where we start looking at other aspects of life too, such as dating or getting into shape. If those are your priorities rather than your career, then you can skip the ‘coming up with a strategy’ part and go straight to the ‘following the steps’ part.
The difficulty at this stage and what causes many people to fail, is creating goals that are simple to follow.
If you want to get into great shape and have a bodybuilder’s physique for instance, then you might have written a goal along the lines of ‘lose 3 stone by next year’ or ‘add 1 inch to my biceps by three months’.
These goals are terrible. No offence.
So what’s the problem specifically? It’s that the objectives are far too vague and far too distant.